I felt it necessary to explain the term “Cowboy Pinball” that I used in the previous post. It’s an obscure game played by horses and mules. (I’ll use a mule for this example, they’re the better players.) It’s played in a highly reinforced round pen, usually between 40-50 feet in diameter with at least a seven foot fence. For added excitement, a sturdy pole can be placed in the center of the circle, as is used in the South American horse training tradition.

The game is initiated by the mule when, after several unsuccessful attempts to remove their rider, they decide to play pinball instead of just bucking. Pinball involves accelerating across the center region of the round pen, then veering randomly into the fence. From the mule’s point of view, the more perpendicular the impact the better. A glancing blow on the fence run the risk of stripping the rider off, while a straight impact just knocks them back in their seat.

Contrary to what you might think, the object of the mule’s game isn’t to remove the rider, but to keep the cowboy in play as long as possible. This is done by keeping them off balance, repeatedly crashing into a fence, rebounding in new direction, and repeating. The center pole, if present, can be used in a glancing fashion to remove stirrups, bang shins and kneecaps, or otherwise keep the game going.

Every sport has its stars, and this one is no different. You can tell the real gifted equine athletes because of their ability to throw their heads back or to one side, taking the impact on their chest. Not only does this save them from injury, but it shortens the possible response time of the rider. At thirty plus miles an hour, the time between the mule’s chest hitting the fence, and the cowboy hitting the fence, is really too short to execute much of a defense. A quick mule will be almost to the next fence before the cowboy stops seeing stars.

Now the object of the game for the cowboy is a bit different than the mule’s, he doesn’t want to play this game at all. He wants to regain control, and stay away from fences. Regaining control involves directing the flight. Circling is good, pinball is bad. In that short span between stars and the next fence, you must regain directional control. Deflect the path of the flight, turn it, and you control it. The game is won and lost on that next fence. If you can turn the mule away from one fence, your almost there. You miss one fence, and the next one is easier, and so on… just don’t forget that damned center pole.

It’s an exciting game, but I’m happy to say I don’t play anymore. I’m too old for that $%#@.